Stalling

With two weeks to go until the Ironman, I am remarkably calm.. Oh wait, that's because I am not actually racing this year. Thoughts continue to roll through my head about next year, though. I have the ability, given my motivation level, to get the necessary training time in for 2008, but given my intense school schedule this past year, I am not confident I can keep that up through the tougher times.
So, I'm setting this out as a challenge to myself... and a bit of a mission. I have been somewhat lazy this year in terms of training. I've sputtered at the best of times, going a few days on but then requiring a long period of recovery as I caught up on projects. It's tough to balance the two, I am discovering. I had this challenge while trying to build a career as a financial advisor, and i let the job take the majority of my focus... But now I have entered a field that I am truly inspired and passionate about - filmmaking - and it requires more of my time, an erratic schedule, and sometimes a lot of focus.
The key to any type of success in this is in planning, a technique I am haphazardly amateurish at.
Bottom line is this, though. I like how being in "Ironman shape" makes me feel. I need to prove that I like that enough to dedicate myself to it. It may mean early morning trainer rides again, (amazingly enough I found myself more able in January to accomplish this), runs, etc. and a lot of solo training. However, I DO know that Masters swimming s at 5:30am on Tuesdays and Thursdays... I know I won't have class at that time. So, I can plan on that.
The other level to this is energy. I need lots of it. I can't afford to feel exhausted by every workout. I can be tired, but I need to be able to recover quickly. This is a grim reality that I am facing in that it will mean a drastic change to my eating habits. I am better at this, but not good enough to manage a hectic work schedule and training...
But if I treat Ironman as a reward for being able to make these healthy changes to my life, then I will be all the better for it.
Back to work... Two weeks until sign up, then the fun begins!
The Road to 2008!

Just realized this is going to be my 200th post. It's taken me almost 2 months to get to it, though...
Well, school has knocked the crap out of me, along with getting a little sick while doing homework, etc...
So, have I found a solution to my time constraints? Sorta. I have begun working on the 10-hour/week plan for training. This is a plan to take me straight until Ironman. It is my INTENTION to see this through to the finish line.
The best line I have heard recently is that the best training plan is the one you can follow, so I am abandoning the common programs I have seen and am going to build one that I can fit.
The first step starts with joining the Hershey's, a local running group that does three high-intensity running workouts/week. I am looking to maximize results and minimize time, so higher intensity seems like the way to go. Learning to fall in love with the wonderful world of "Zone 3"... So, Thursdays and Saturdays will be those training days for running. Meaning I will move my long ride to either Sunday or during one of my free mornings during the week for the next couple of months at least.

Stay tuned, should have the plan up in the next few days...

Guilt...

After I wrote the last post, of course, I had an attack of awesome guilt and regret at having not raced... SO I saught pennance and took a 2 hr ride on the indoor trainer while watching the "Road to Perdition".

Amazing the power of guilt.

A race passes...

In the end... I just wasn't ready to try it.

I sit now, at my desk, staring out at the pouring rain in Vancouver. Where should I be? Well, if holding true to my training schedule, I would be almost finishing the bike ride of the UBC Olympic Triathlon.

But I am not. I made the call on Friday, realizing that the forecast of heavy rain and my own feeling of a lackadazical training regime meant that this would not be of value to me. Except now I think it might have given me a kick in the teeth.

The truth of the matter is that training has been sporadic at the best of times, and this now has me looking in the mirror and saying "put up or shut up".

I am proud that my school has taken a priority in my life, and that I've found a passion for something creative and new. However, my past "obsession", or "love", is being sacrificed. And now I see it. I fight with it. I fight with getting in the time to train properly, and mixing that with my ability to finish long art homework, school, work, and getting some sleep. And yet, I know as well as anybody, that my relationship with triathlon is co-dependent. I need that exercise, that goal, that regime, as a way to keep my own personal well-being going.

But as I get more and more into school, exercise becomes less-and-less a consideration. And this has hit me more so today than it has the past few weeks.

In trying to build around following a dream, am I now willing to work harder to keep that semblance of what once was in my quest?

Is the desire there to try?